I sit in the John Carroll computer lab, sweating after a huge volunteer dance party. We've had a few of them throughout these days together each one is more entertaining than before. I tried to teach some people the Cupid Shuffle (if you don't know it, then look it up. It's actually a Chicago thing) but it didn't catch on as fast as I thought.
It's already the end of Friday and we leave on Monday morning for Ecuador. Where did the time go!? I'm not sure, but it went and here we are only 2 days away from the year long adventure that is bound to shape the lives of 11 gringos forever.
All the volunteers just returned from a 1.5 day silent retreat. If you know me, then you can imagine how difficult it was for me to remain silent for that long, but I did and I'm very proud of it too. But the silence and lack of things to do was well overdue. For the first time in 9 days I was able to be alone with my thoughts, fears, dreams, realities, desires, aspirations...with myself. I often like to be alone when at home, hiding in my room or basement to watch TV by myself, but this time was much more different.
I spent the majority of time reading, thinking and listening. I read meditations, thought about the months ahead and listened for God, for that deep calling that we long to hear when we are afraid of what the future holds. What a blessing it really was, to be silent, to be still, to be open to whatever came to mind without worrying about where I was supposed to be or what I had to do.
Obviously 36 hours of silence (most of which was spent sleeping) is not going to change my life. What it did do, however, was allow me to place things in order to feel as if I have some control over my life. Probably what I will take away most from the retreat is this: "I live a life of faith, but my prayer life sometimes wains." I just have to keep reminding myself of that.
The faster it approaches, the more unreal it seems. In no time at all I'll be sweating like none other and eating more rice and beans then ever imagined...I just really wished I had learned how to cook before I left!
Love and miss everyone.
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silence eh? haha i would go insane but i can totally see where it would be really peaceful. I hope you make the best of your time out there! See things we'll never see, smell things we'll never smell, feel things we can never imagine feeling. Don't be sad about leaving this is an awesome thing be excited and love it!!
ReplyDeleteyour best friend 4eva!
danielle
Once you get to Rostro and get to blog again, you NEED to tell me about your taxi-ing experience at the airport! You know it's my favorite part of flying :) I'm so excited for you and can't wait to read about all the wonderful things you're doing and lives you're helping change.
ReplyDeleteI'll still lasso the moon for you any day. :)
Jackie